2.2.16

25 - Whys and Wherefores

Cleo had often asked herself why the bishop had not wanted to be addressed by his name. Why was the name James on the contract and not that of John or Robert? Was it James who had studied theology? If he was one of the brothers, was he now sure that he would not be rumbled? Or – and this was the most relevant question - was James McDuff even the real bishop under some kind of pressure? Had his brothers or some other influences forced him into being like he was? Was he being blackmailed? If so, by whom and for what reason?
Her phone call to the archbishop’s office shed more light on the matter, but left Cleo bemused. James McDuff was indeed the name of the appointed bishop. But the bishop they knew could be one of the other brothers if he wasn’t the real bishop, if they had swapped names and assuming a second brother had committed fratricide. Why would a genuine man of the cloth behave so despicably? Or was the brother who lived on his wits the trouble-maker? She would take an even closer look at the documents she had obtained from the bishop’s office. Fortunately, she had taken the precaution of making copies before handing them over to the police. She was not sure what she was looking for this time, but something told Cleo that all three brothers were involved in some way.
Cleo phoned Gary Hurley to tell him about her finds at the bishop’s office. She was treated to a lecture about breaking and entering.
“Stuff it Mr Hurley,” Cleo said. “Do you want the documents or don’t you?”
“Yes. Can you drop them in to HQ?”
“I can’t take the time, but I’ll get someone else to.”
“Thanks, Miss Hartley and don’t take my garbage about breaking and entering to heart.”
“I wasn’t going to,” retorted Cleo.
In the meantime the police had also ascertained that James McDuff was the name of the officially appointed bishop. They had obtained a copy of various documents he had signed on behalf of the diocese and the signature on them was identical with all the other written samples they compared. Gary felt bound to pass that information on. Cleo felt bound to tell Mr Hurley that there were actually three brothers who could probably pass for James McDuff. Hurley was not pleased that she knew that. He had kept that bit of information back. It was thanks to Rick that she knew about the birth of triplets in Scotland all those years ago. She did not tell Hurley where she got her information and he did not ask. Hurley and Hartley were not getting on well together.
When James McDuff was approached in his hospital bed for questioning – and he was being guarded by a police rota as much for his own safety as to ensure that he did not get away - he was uncooperative, complaining that he was in too much pain. There was nothing for it but to wait until his condition improved, the doctors insisted. But the bishop was play-acting. When the bishop’s secretary got to the office next morning, having decided not to take the week off, after all, since her boyfriend had to work anyway, who did she find sitting as his desk, but the bishop himself in a jovial mood?
“Ah, there you are, Chrissie,” he greeted her. “I’m going to close this office until after Christmas and you can take a holiday until you hear from me.”
“Are you well enough, Sir?”
“Of course I’m sure. I’ll be out of town for a while. Church affairs, you know. I won’t need a secretary. Go home and enjoy yourself, my dear.”
With Chrissie safely out of the way, John McDuff, who had been phoned by his brother and given instructions about finding and removing any suspicious documents, and had fooled Chrissie into believing he was her boss, sorted through all the bishop’s papers with a view to disposing of anything associated with property deals. It would be worth his while. The McDuffs did not do one another gratuitous favours.
John McDuff could not judge whether anything was missing, so he would to report to his brother James that all the documents he thought might be relevant had been removed, not actually saying who removed them since he had not found anything incriminating. It was just his bad luck that on her way to the bus stop Chrissie bumped into a plain-clothes detective who had been assigned to make a brief assessment of what had to be done at the bishop’s office and seal the premises.
“I think you came out of the bishop’s office just now, didn’t you?” the detective said.
Chrissie didn’t think there was anything strange about that question.
“Yes, Sir. The bishop has given me a holiday until after Christmas. He’s going away on business and doesn’t need a secretary.”
“‘So he told you that, did he?”
“Yes, Sir. He’s still in the office sorting out the papers he needs for his trip.”’
“Is he indeed?”
“Yes, Sir. Anything wrong?”
“No, nothing wrong. You just run along.”
As soon as the girl was out of earshot, the detective took out his mobile phone and summoned assistance. The bishop was laid up in hospital, so the man in the office must be a look-alike to have fooled his secretary. Minutes later a police commando was able to arrest him without a struggle. A feather in their cap and more headlines for the tabloids.
Though gratified at hearing about the arrest – and Mr Hurley had been kind enough to phone and inform her - Cleo still thought they had all overlooked something. On the spur of the moment, she asked if they had any photos of the bishop’s driver and could she come to HQ and look at them.
A brief glance at the two photos of the McDuffs known to the police and Cleo confirmed that they were interchangeable as far as looks were concerned. The photo of the bishop’s chauffeur, taken by a security camera in the hotel foyer showed a burly looking man with a full beard and wearing thick horn-rimmed glasses. He had shoulder length hair. He was altogether a bit scruffy and Cleo wondered how he had managed to get the job of driver. Unless...
She looked at the photo of the bishop again.
“Can you modify this?” she asked.
“On the computer screen or with a marker?”
“Can you change things on photos digitally?”
“Madam, we have the newest computer programmes. What do want me to do?”
“Can you put glasses on the bishop’s nose. Some like the ones on this photo of the driver? And a beard like the driver’s? And lengthen his hair.”
This took hardly any time at all. The IT expert was even able to mount one photo on top of the other. All the photos were printed, including a brand new one of the guy they had picked up at the bishop’s office. Now it was unmistakeable. You could hardly tell one man from the other. A DNA test would prove without doubt that the driver they knew as Jim Cross was in fact Robert McDuff, the third brother. Or was he John? Or even James? An exchange of names within the trio would be almost impossible to prove.
The following morning the newspapers again graced the first page with the latest on the McDuff case, but this time there were four photos (two of the guy calling himself Jim Cross).Were all three into a fiendishly clever plan. Cleo now believed that the bishop really was the genuine article, corrupted or abetted by his two siblings.
***
The days following the identification of the three McDuff brothers produced no further sensations and slowly things returned to normal, which for Dorothy and Cleo meant a concerted effort to get the arrangements for the impro theatre show finalized. Bafflement about the McDuff brothers would not get that evening staged. As the show was to be part of the run-up to Christmas and was replacing the usual entertainment, it would have to be worth watching. In the light of what had being going on elsewhere recently, it was admittedly difficult to focus on the event.
Happily, Mr Parsnip was able to dismiss the issue of St Peter’s closing. He had been reassured on best authority that no such thing would happen. For the coming Sunday the vicar had therefore composed a very special sermon that was broadly based on the adage that home is where the heart is. He would expose the bishop’s misdeeds from the pulpit and promise his congregation that his heart was and always would be in Upper Grumpsfield.
It should be added that writing this sermon had moved him to tears and he could feel the missionary fervour overcoming him. He would have to practise hard if he were to retain control of his emotions during the service.
Was Edith’s disappearance less than two weeks earlier? She had completely recovered her memory and was feeling much better, a condition that was boosted by the knowledge that the evil bishop was now out of circulation, having been moved to a prison hospital where he would continue his convalescence behind bars, his phantom pains having been disclosed for the sham they were.
Clare stopped worrying about her sister and was glad to stand in for Cleo at the library during the investigations into the McDuff crimes, a process that was still ongoing.

Supported by Mr Hurley who had offered Cleo his first name in recognition of her work on the McDuff case, Cleo decided to investigate the property developers, something the cops could not do alone under a blanket of secrecy. Her theory was that a McDuff brother who was not the bishop had worked there and gained inside knowledge. The company had not actually committed a crime unless they blackmailed the bishop. Gary agreed. He know understood that Cleo was a private investigator, and though he disapproved of women being private eyes, he was prepared to go along with this woman he had never met wo was plainly intelligent enough to do a good job. On her part, Cleo was curious about what Gary and his colleagues could achieve. She hoped they would use their databases to uncover any previous crimes known to have been committed by one or other of the McDuffs. The third brother, killed in the road accident, was beyond redemption, so any investigation into his affairs would be purely to tie up loose ends. Was he the ruffian the third triplet was claimed to be? The two surviving Mcduffs were unlikely to reveal anything about him that they could keep hidden, especially their true identities. A heightened version of loyalty among thieves, Cleo mused, the biggest question of all being “Who did what?